We’ve all seen the scene; woman takes a bite out of molten lava cake, and moans in ecstasy. Woman takes a bite out of a bar of chocolate, and shivers with delight. Woman takes a bite out of a creampuff, and declares it better than sex. Does that, in fact, make it a powerpuff? Because let’s face it, the ability to satiate a woman’s desire with just one bite is pretty much a superpower unlike no other. And we all know that with great power, comes great responsibility.
What is it about women and desserts? Well, for one, desserts come in all shapes and sizes. Okay fine, so do lovers. But desserts come in a mouthwatering range of options: cakes, loafs, chocolates, ice-cream, tarts, pies, brownies, sweet, savoury, buttery, glazed, cream-filled… you get the gist. Desserts also go all out to prove that while size does matter, it doesn’t discriminate; a family member’s birthday is a job for big boys like our Black and Bold cake, or our fresh Berry Pavlova, but that monthly office brunch would require bite-sized heroes like our Salted Caramel Cookie Bites, or our awesome Nutella Pods.
On top of that, desserts are always there for you (thanks to Eat Cake Today, no less!). They’re only flakey when there’s a delicious yearning for them to be, and they won’t take a chunk out of your heart and slice the rest apart, crumbling you into nothing but an aftertaste of what once was. Instead, they exist for you. They live long enough to satisfy a craving, to provide that bad day with a delectable purpose, to deliver that much-needed self-affirmation to own your cheat day the way it should be owned. And then they die a glorious death, to survive as just a lustful sigh, like the one that escaped our mouths from the moment we met, ‘til that last lingering bite…
No regrets, we’d both whisper, no regrets.
So wait, are we saying that men don’t understand women like cakes do? That’s a big, fat yes. Are we saying that men don’t enjoy cakes as much as women do? Oh hell, no. Men appreciate a good tart every now and then. Men like big bundts and they cannot lie. The only difference is that men won’t trade sex for the best of cakes. Okay, so are we insinuating that women don’t enjoy sex as much as men do? On the contrary – give us a lover smothered in melted Valhorna chocolate and buttercream frosting, and we’ll show you how to multitask with pleasure.
With that said, it’s all about supply and demand. Sure, cream puffs may be Powerpuffs made of sugar and spice and everything nice, disguised as sweet clouds of airy, unsuspecting wonder, but without the love and appreciation from customers to boost them up into the air, flying into our mouths like we just don’t care, they’d be nothing but cream puffs coated with the ennui of existential fallacies. The satisfaction of indulgence makes for the demand; it becomes a powerful tool to demand as much as it becomes a privilege to supply. We understand men as much as we understand women, we get that women have a lifelong relationship with desserts, just as we get that men need help getting out of the doghouse every now and then.
Hence, Eat Cake Today, all day, err’day.